Help:LangMaker and VirtualBox
You'll have noticed that LangMaker doesn't support 64-bit architecture. The last time it was updated was somewhere around Windows 95. So, what we're gonna do is give it a Windows 95 Virtual Machine to run in! :D
1. Get you some VirtualBox
Now, the really nice thing is that VirtualBox is multi-platform, so you don't even have to be running a Windows machine to make this work. Go to the VirtualBox download page, and grab the latest version for your system, and install that. Go into Settings and tell it where you're going to put your VM images, so it's looking in the right place for them. This is hella important.
2. Get you some Windows 95
Microsoft has been kind enough to release free VM images of their older operating systems for those of us who still need them to run 32-bit software. You can get a copy of Windows 95 over on the Internet Archive. Unpack the .vdi file into the directory VirtualBox is expecting to find VM images in.
3. Import the image into VirtualBox
Click on the 'New' button. You'll get a box that asks four questions:
- Name: Type whatever you want to call the system into this box. Make it something memorable and obvious, like 'Windows 95'.
- Machine Folder: This should already be set to where you're keeping your images. It's a dropdown, not a browse button, so if there's nothing there, go back to settings and tell it where to look.
- Type: What kind of OS is this? It's Windows. Tell it that.
- Version: Windows 95
Click on 'Next'. On the next screen, it'll suggest you give the VM 64MB RAM. DO NOT give it more than 64MB. It won't boot. I found this out the hard way... Click 'Next' again.
This is the part where we tell it which image to use. Select 'Use an existing virtual hard drive file'. There's probably nothing in the dropdown, so hit 'Browse' and go find your VM image. Select that. Click 'Create'.
4. Configure your Virtual Machine
Now you've got a machine listed on the left, and some info about it on the right, if you select it. It'll pretty much tell you everything you just put in that form. You'll also see some buttons across the top on the right -- New, Settings, and Start.
- Click on 'Settings'.
- Go to 'System' > 'Motherboard' and tick 'Enable I/O APIC', because it's Windows, and it says to enable it for Windows systems.
- Go to 'System' > 'Advanced' and untick 'Enable VT-x/AMD-V'. This is SUPER IMPORTANT. THE MACHINE WILL NOT BOOT UNLESS YOU DO THIS.
- Go to 'User Interface' > 'Machine' and untick 'ACPI Shutdown'. Tick 'Power Off'.
- Windows 95 doesn't support shared clipboard or drag & drop, so don't bother. This is going to be Pure Fucking Hell.
5. FIRE IT UP!
Click on the 'Start' button. The first thing you'll notice is that it's grabbed your keyboard and mouse. You need to press the right-side CTRL key to get back to your host computer. Just tap it and click on any other open window, and you'll be back to normal. Click back into the VM window (not just on the menu or titlebar) to go back to it.
Windows 95 will ask you to log in. Just hit 'Cancel', and it'll load a shiny new desktop full of things you hoped you'd never see again.
Note: Every once in a while, it'll just shit out on boot. Hit that CTRL if you need your mouse back and go to the 'Machine' menu and hit 'Power Off', then start it again. You might have to do it a couple times, but it'll come around. Also DO NOT use the 'restart' option from 95's start menu, or it'll chuck you right into one of those.
6. Get you some LangMaker
Make a folder on the desktop called 'LangMaker'. You're about to save a bunch of crap into it.
Open Internet Exploder. Sorry about that, but it's Windows 95... Type in, because you can't copy-paste, this long-ass URL:
It will throw an error. Just tell it 'no', and the rest of the page will load. Scroll down to where it says 'Download it now!' but click the update link first, just so you don't lose your place. Save that to the folder you just made. Same with the Full Install it jumps to when you click 'Download it now'.
You should have two files:
- fullinst.zip
- langm111.exe
You will notice the system doesn't know what the fuck to do with the .zip file! Don't worry about it. We'll get there. While we're still here, though, grab you some base files. Personally, I suggest the Latin one, but you might as well snag them all.
7. Get something to open the god damn zip file with
This was less of a pain in the ass when Windows 95 was a current operating system, but we're not entirely shit out of luck, yet... I've found a version of WinZip from eighteen years ago and we're gonna install it on that Windows 95 system!
Click on the download button, and you'll get some file with a weird-ass name. Save it as type: All files, and add a .exe to the end. You should end up with the installer for WinZip 8.1. Run that shit. You can pretty much just 'Next' your way through it. Close it, when it opens up, then right click that zip file and ... 'WinZip' > 'Unzip here'.
8. Installing LangMaker
It's installed. All you gotta do is unpack it. To run it, double-click on 'langm111.exe', because the only thing changed in the patch is the executable. All the other files remain the same.
Okay, so, I was supposed to be in bed four hours ago, but instead I wrote this lunatic guide, which I'll edit after I've gotten three hours of sleep and a diet pepsi. I'm relatively sure that if you follow the directions as written, this will work.